Pope Announces Retirement

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Pope Approves New “Child-Friendly” Vatican

His Holiness Pope Benedict XVI has approved a new design for the Vatican that incorporates new “child-friendly” features such as the Sandusky Chapel that has a painted ceiling showing Elmo reaching out to a pubescent Adam.

Nuns And Vatican In “Dialog”

American nuns and Vatican officials are reportedly engaging in an “open dialog” after the Leadership Conference of Women Religious was criticized in a doctrinal assessment by the Vatican Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith for not speaking out strongly enough against gay marriage, women priests and abortion.

Vatican, Conservatives Criticize “Avatar”

Because there isn’t enough real shit to bitch about.