Mariah Carey And Nick Cannon Reflect On Birth Of Twins

Nick Cannon says his wife Mariah Carey found motherhood to be a real “eye-opener”. “As you know, Mariah’s not the sharpest tack in the carpet – she was as surprised when they were born as she was when they were conceived.”

“Nobody told me I would get so fat” Carey mused. “Or that they would be so much bigger coming out as when they went in.”

Carey is of course famous for her many hit songs, and for her reaction to seeing pictures of starving children, when she said she’d love to be that thin, except for “the flies and death and stuff”.

Mariah Carey and husband Nick Cannon are the proud if somewhat surprised parents of twins.

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Serbs Boo Amy Winehouse Off Stage

An audience in Belgrade, Serbia booed singer Amy Winehouse as she stumbled through her songs and aimlessly wandered about the stage this weekend. The obviously intoxicated Winehouse even brought a backup singer to her microphone to fill-in at one point, then left the stage with a contemptuous wave of her hand toward the jeering audience.

A representative for the famously drug and alcohol-addled Grammy-winner announced cancellation of her next two shows and probably the rest of her career. “She wasn’t drunk or high” the rep stated. “It’s that huge wig she wears – the pressure on her cranium makes her black-out.”

Amy Winehouse is booed by a concert audience in Serbia. If you bomb this bad in Serbia, you really BOMBED.

U.S. Drops Charges Against Osama bin Laden

The United States dropped all criminal charges against al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden yesterday. “It’s rather embarrassing” Attorney General Eric Holder said. “I’m sure if the President had known the charges would be dropped he wouldn’t have killed him. We should probably have some kind of law that states people are innocent until proven guilty, or something.”

Or maybe we just shouldn’t waste time making formal charges against someone we have absolutely no plans to ever bring to trial, but instead shoot on sight. Not that shooting bin Laden was a bad thing, just maybe injudicious if there were actual pending criminal charges against him.

Osama bin Laden reacts to news the U.S. has formally dropped all charges against him.