Everyone is 20 years older so it will be 20 times funnier!
Provided by Pox News. Still waiting for Abe Vigoda’s death to be a hoax.
Here at GraceLessLand we are privy to some inside information about “The Force Awakens”, mostly because this stuff is pretty obvious from the trailers.
- Luke has gone over to the Dark Side – that’s him in the mask holding the red lightsaber. He has become obsessed with making his father’s dream of galactic domination a reality. This is great for Mark Hamill, because not only has it been a long time between paychecks but Darth Vader was much more popular than Luke Skywalker ever was, so he should be able to milk this for a ton of voice-over jobs, and he can double his autograph fee at conventions.
- Han Solo has found true love – with his best friend and better-half, Chewbacca. That’s what Princess Leia is crying about when she hugs him in the trailer. But Han and Chewie are unable to marry under the repressive laws of the desert planet they are living on, and so once again they must fight for what is right.
- Princess Leia is not handling menopause well – when she has hot flashes her Force Powers cause people around her to spontaneously combust.
- C3PO and R2D2 aren’t droids – but are actually a Jedi mind-trick to conceal their true identities as the actual twins fathered by Darth Vader. This is why they are never the droids you are looking for.
- Storm Troopers are not clones – they are temps – that’s why they are so bad at their job.
So we could take them and write goofy dialog balloons for them and it would be legal!
What would the fun be in that?
This is a quote from the Wikipedia entry on guitar pickups:
….the humbucking pickup was invented by Joseph Raymond “Ray” Butts, but Seth Lover of Gibson was also working on one himself. Ray Butts initially developed one on his own and later worked withGretsch. Who developed it first is a matter of some debate, but Ray Butts was awarded the first patent (U.S. Patent 2,892,371) and Seth Lover came next (U.S. Patent 2,896,491). Ultimately, both men developed essentially the same concept, but Ray Butts was never recognized as the one who produced it first.
I wonder why? Say you’re developing an ad campaign in 1955 for cool new noiseless guitar pickups. Here on the one hand you have an inventor named “Lover” working at Gibson, and on the other you have a guy named “Butts” working for Gretsch….