When you want to keep giving the Egyptian military $1 billion a year in aid money, that’s when.
Members of an American missionary group who had been taken hostage in Egypt three days ago have been released by their captor. “They are at security headquarters with us now, in good condition. The negotiations succeeded, but we did not give in to the kidnappers’ demands,” said Gen. Ahmed Bakr, head of security in northern Sinai. “Now if you will excuse me, I have to go buy 500 goats and a camel.”
Former Egyptian strongman Hosni Mubarak has reportedly been declared clinically dead at a hospital in Cairo after suffering a massive heart attack. However, sources in the Egyptian military dispute this claim, saying Mubarak is alive but in critical condition, kind of like Egypt.
Egyptian MP Anwar al-Balkimi, of the ultra-conservative Nour Party, was expelled from the Egyptian Parliament for claiming he was mugged in order cover-up a nose job. Now belly-dancer Sama al-Masri claims she is al-Bakimi’s second wife.
The Islamist Nour Party adheres to the principles of the Salaf, which means “predecessors” or “ancestors”. The Salafi take the earliest Muslims as model examples of Islamic practice. Plastic surgery and a secret marriage to an unveiled belly-dancer are against Salafi fundamentalist principles.
So this is the equivalent of a member of Congress elected on a Tea Party platform having a sex-change and a second wife who is a prostitute. In other words, Egypt has achieved American-style democracy.
A panel of three civilian judges has ruled that the Egyptian military has no right to perform “virginity tests” on female protesters being held prisoner in military prisons. The military has claimed the tests are necessary to protect prison personnel against false charges of abuse.
“In our culture it is not allowed to rape a virgin” a military spokesperson said. “We must determine who is a candidate for abuse and who is not. We wouldn’t want to do anything wrong.”